At Christmas Time We Couldn't Afford Tinsel,

My Wife And I Keep Fighting About Sex And Money. I Think She Charges Me Too Much.

Last Week I Told My Psychiatrist, 'i Keep Thinking About Suicide', And He Told Me From Now I Have To Pay In Advance.

If You Could Learn To Make Love, I Could Fire The Chauffer.

One Day As I Came Home Early, I Saw A Man Jogging Naked. I Said To The Guy, 'hey, Buddy, Why Are You Doing That?' He Said, 'because You Came Home Early.'

I Tell Ya, My Wife's A Lousy Cook. After Dinner, I Don't Brush My Teeth. I Count Them.