To Give You An Idea How Well

I Tell Ya, My Wife's A Lousy Cook. After Dinner, I Don't Brush My Teeth. I Count Them.

In High School, When I Played Football I Got No Respect. I Shared A Locker With A Mop.

...went To A Bar For A Few Drinks. The Bartender Asked What I Wanted. "surprise Me", I Said. So He Showed Me A Naked Picture Of My Wife.

Yeah, I Know I'm Ugly... I Said To A Bartender, 'make Me A Zombie.' He Said 'god Beat Me To It.'

I'll Tell You One Thing, I Know How To Satisfy My Wife In Bed, Yeah, I Leave.