This Morning When I Put On My

I Told My Doctor, "i've Swallowed A Bottle Of Sleeping Pills" And He Told Me To Have A Few Drinks And Get Some Rest.

We Lived In A Neighborhood That Was Too Rich For Us. When I Was Young, I Had To Deliver Groceries To The Homes Of The Kids I Went To School With. I Had To Go To The Back Doors To Make The Deliveries. It Was Embarrassing. That Was One Thing Out Of A Hundred.

I Told My Psychiatrist That Everyone Hates Me. He Said I Was Being Ridiculous - Everyone Hasn't Met Me Yet.

I Went To Look For A Used Car And Found My Wife's Dress In The Back Seat.

I Tell Ya When I Fly, I Don't Get No Respect. I Took One Of Those Cheap Flights, No Frills. I Finished Eatin' And Had To Do The Dishes.