There's Only One Thing Wrong With My

When I Was A Kid I Got No Respect. The Time I Was Kidnapped, And The Kidnappers Sent My Parents A Note They Said, "we Want Five Thousand Dollars Or You'll See Your Kid Again."

For Christmas One Year I Bought My Son A Bb Gun. He Bought Me A T-shirt With A Bulls Eye On The Back.

Never Guess Your Wife's Size. Just Buy Anything Marked Petite And Hold On To The Receipt.

Once I Pulled A Job, I Was So Stupid. I Picked A Guy's Pocket On An Airplane And Made A Run For It.

I'd Like To Get Some New Clothes, But I Can't Find A Big And Short Store.