The Sight Of Home Looks Best After

Nothing Is So Embarrassing As Watching Someone Do Something That You Said Couldn't Be Done.

A Man Can Please His Wife With A Box Of Candy, Surprise Her With A Bouquet Of Flowers, And Make Her Suspicious With A Gold Bracelet.

Inflation Is When You Pay Fifteen Dollars For The Ten-dollar Haircut You Used To Get For Five Dollars When You Had Hair.

The Government Deficit Is The Difference Between The Amount Of Money The Government Spends And The Amount It Has The Nerve To Collect.

If You Lend Someone 20 Dollars And Never See That Person Again, It's Probably Worth It.