The Shape I'm In, I Could Donate

I Tell Ya, I Know The Best Way To Get Girls. I Hang Out At Women's Prisons, And Wait For Parolees.

I'm Not A Sexy Guy. I Went To A Hooker. I Dropped My Pants. She Dropped Her Price.

I Was An Ugly Kid; When I Was Born, After The Doctor Cut The Cord, He Hung Himself.

My Kids Scotch Tape Worms To The Sidewalk And Watch The Birds Get Hernias.

I Tell Ya When I Fly, I Don't Get No Respect. I Took One Of Those Cheap Flights, No Frills. I Finished Eatin' And Had To Do The Dishes.