The Good News Is Hopeful Doesn't Mean

When You're A Comic, It's Like Being Born Gay. It's What You Want To Do Every Night When Your Other Friends Are Out At Night Going To Parties.

We Don't Live In A Democracy; We Live In A Hypocrisy.

And We're Just All Made Of Molecules And We're Hurtling Through Space Right Now.

Like I Said About Seinfeld And Chris Rock, They're A Great Combination Of Brilliance And Hard Work. [but] There Are People Who Are Brilliant And Don't Work Hard, And There Are People Who Are Brilliant And Sabotage Themselves.

I Am Jewish And Proud Of This Culturally And Ethnically - The Ways In Which I Was Born This Way And Am Happy With Whom I Am.