The Best Time To Have A Baby

Someone On Twitter Sent Me A Page From A Textbook. It Had A Picture Of A Football Player Next To A Picture Of Me. The Juxtaposition Was Meant To Illustrate Two Meanings Of "offensive." Seriously. It Broke My Heart. It's That Accepted What I Do Is Offensive?

I Do Enjoy And Feel Compelled To Talk About Things That Are Taboo. One, Because I Think I'm A Troublemaker Inside, If Someone Says, "don't Say That," It's All I Want To Say. And Also, Something I Learned In Therapy ... Which Is Darkness Can't Exist In The Light, And Then That Made Me Think Of Something That Mr. Rogers Said, Which Is, "if It's Mentionable, It's Manageable."

Jesus Is Magic, Because He Turned Water Into Wine. I Think He Made The Statue Of Liberty Disappear In The 80s Or Something.

My Mom Was Always Someone Who If, Even Now, I Say I Met A Certain Famous Person, She Always Says, "she's Married To So And So!"

Don’t Forget, God Can See You Masturbating. But Don’t Stop. He’s Almost There.