The First Thing I'll Do If Elected

If You Ain't Texan, I Ain't Got Time For You.

Remember, The Legislature Is The Joke, Not Our Campaign.

The Main Health Hazard In The World Today Is People Who Don't Love Themselves.

Musicians Can Run This State Better Than Politicians. We Won't Get A Lot Done In The Mornings, But We'll Work Late And Be Honest.

If You Elect Me The First Jewish Justice Of The Peace, I'll Reduce The Speed Limits To 54.95!