The Brain Is Like A Tv Set;

An Expert Is Someone Called In At The Last Minute To Share The Blame.

Youth Is When You Think You'll Live Forever. Old Age Is When You Wonder How You've Lived So Long.

Nobody's Too Fat - They're Just Too Short.

Nothing Is So Embarrassing As Watching Someone Do Something That You Said Couldn't Be Done.

A Neighbor Will Stand At Your Door Talking For 20 Minutes Because She Doesn't Have Time To Come In.