The Best Part About Being My Age

Newsreader: A Huge Asteroid Could Destroy Earth! And By Coincidence, That's The Subject Of Tonight's Miniseries. Dogbert: In Science, Researchers Proved That This Simple Device Can Keep Idiots Off Your Television Screen. [tv Remote Control] Click.

Every Credible Scientist On Earth Says Your Products Harm The Environment. I Recommend Paying Weasels To Write Articles Casting Doubt On The Data. Then Eat The Wrong Kind Of Foods And Hope You Die Before The Earth Does.

Your Shower Is Ready - I Turned It On Last Night.

The Best Any Human Can Do Is To Pick A Delusion That Helps Him Get Through The Day

In The Future, Airplanes Will Be Flown By A Dog And A Pilot. And The Dog's Job Will Be To Make Sure That If The Pilot Tries To Touch Any Of The Buttons, The Dog Bites Him.