Remember, Folks, I Am A Comedian, Not

I Have What I Call A-list Moments, But Believe Me, I'm Still On The D-list.

So Yes, I Say Things I Regret Constantly, And I Just Can't Help It.

There's One Thing That's Really Great About Waking Up Early, And It's Not Jogging Or Greeting The Day - It's Just That That's When They Make Doughnuts.

I Have No Limits, No Filter, No Class, No Poise. No Decorum. Just Fun.

Oh, I Constantly Say Things That I Regret. I Mortify Myself Constantly. But That's Just Part Of The Deal. I'm Not Really Sure What's Going To Come Out Of My Mouth.