Peter Mandelson Is The Only Man I

Seeing John Major Govern The Country Is Like Watching Edward Scissorhands Try To Make Balloon Animals.

I Cannot Be Alone In Being Pretty Nauseated By Red Nose Day, Or At Least Its Television Manifestation. Do I Think That Wretchedly Poor Children In Africa Should Get Food And Life-saving Drugs? Of Course. Do I Want To Be Hectored Into Contributing By Celebrities Who Earn More In A 10-minute Slot Than Many Of These Families Get In A Year? Nope.

Some Government Expenditure Actually Makes A Profit. Our Theatre Leads The World. Loads Of Tourists Must Be Attracted By The Fact That You Could Spend A Week In London Doing Nothing But Visit Superb Museums And Galleries, Free.

They're Called Virgin Trains Because They Don't Go All The Way.

The Formal Washington Dinner Party Has All The Spontaneity Of A Japanese Imperial Funeral.