People On The 14th Floor, You Know

My Fake Plants Died Because I Did Not Pretend To Water Them.

I Wanted To Get A Tape Recorder, But I Got A Parrot Instead. I Think I Did That Joke Backwards.

When We Were On Acid, We Would Go Into The Woods, Because There Was Less Chance That You Would Run Into An Authority Figure. But We Ran Into A Bear. My Friend Duane Was There, Raising His Right Hand, Swearing To Help Prevent Forest Fires. He Told Me, "mitchell, Smokey Is Way More Intense In Person!"

I Have An Underwater Camera Just In Case I Crash My Car Into A River, And At The Last Minute I See A Photo Opportunity Of A Fish That I Have Never Seen.

I Hate Flossing, I Wish I Just Had One Long Curvy Tooth. They Didn't Have To Make Separations For Me.