My Mother Used To Rock Me -

I'm Not A Hypochondriac, But My Gynaecologist Firmly Believes I Am.

My Wife Says 90% Of Sex Occurs Between The Ears. But I Need A Girl Who Can Blow More Just My Mind.

I Got Myself Good This Morning Too. I Did My Pushups In The Nude, I Didn't See The Mouse Trap.

After I Got Divorced, I Said To Myself, I Will Never, Ever Get Married Again. It Was In Cement. I Went Through A Really Rough Twenty-five Years, But It Happened Again. I Fell In Love. I Told Her, Baby, I Don't Want A Prenuptial Agreement. This Is It. Everyone Told Me I Was Nuts. Well, My New Wife And I Are Married Six Years And We Get Along Great. You Can Make Anything Work If You're Both Givers.

A Girl Phoned Me The Other Day And Said... 'come On Over, There's Nobody Home.' I Went Over. Nobody Was Home.