My Father Never Raised His Hand To

He Was So Narrow Minded That If He Fell On A Pin It Would Blind Him In Both Eyes.

A Comedian Who Starts Talking To Himself Becomes His Own Audience. This Is Fatal.

He Writes So Well He Makes Me Feel Like Putting My Quill Back In My Goose.

Cocktail Party: A Gathering Held To Enable Forty People To Talk About Themselves At The Same Time. The Man Who Remains After The Liquor Is Gone Is The Host.

Imitation Is The Sincerest Form Of Television.