Martha Stewart Is Now Under House Arrest.

Sarah Palin Has Admitted She Tried Marijuana Several Years Ago, But She Did Not Like It. She Said It Distorted Her Perceptions, Impaired Her Thinking, And She's Hoping That The Effects Will Eventually Wear Off.

Happiness Is A Privilege.

Well, Harry Reid And Other Members Of Congress, They're Just Furious Over This Olympic Uniform Deal. He Says We Should Burn The Uniforms, And It's An Embarrassment And A Disgrace. Not As Embarrassing As Congress Constantly Borrowing Money From The Chinese, But Still Embarrassing.

President Clinton And President Obama Played A Round Of Golf Over The Weekend. President Clinton Asked Obama What His Handicap Was, And Obama Said, 'joe Biden.'

In His First Speech As Speaker, Boehner Thanked His Loved Ones - Tobacco Lobbyists, The Oil Companies, The Ceos.