Let No Man's Deathbed Be A Futon.

I Was Stuck In Traffic And I Looked In The Mirror And In The Car Behind Me There Was A Couple Having A Horrible Argument And Right Below Their Image It Said "objects In Mirror Are Closer Than They Appear". I Just Thought, Man I Hope So Because She Was Pretty Mad.

I Was A Good Student When I Was A Kid, And I Did Everything I Was Supposed To Do, And I Got A's.

I Wish My Name Started With A Comma. That Would Be So Dramatic.

Artistically, I Find Jokes Really Satisfying Aesthetically, Because There's Something Great About Getting An Idea Down To A Sentence Or Two.

There's A Store In My Neighborhood Called Futon World. I Like That Name, 'futon World.' Makes Me Think Of A Magical Place That Gets Less And Less Comfortable Over Time.