I've Never Gambled A Dime. Never, In

I Was Nice To The People In The Philippines For The Two And A Half Years I Was There, Because I Knew Even­tually I'd Have To Kiss Up To Them So My Grandchildren Could Have Toys.

It's Just To Break Things Up Between Stand-up Gigs. I Would Only Do It Periodically. Maybe Just An East Coast Thing.

Al Capone's My Uncle. The Old Days Were A Lot Different. The Latin Casino Was The Big Time. When I Got There I Figured That I Was Doing Pretty Good, Because Remember, I Started In Nothing But After Hours Joints. I Can't Even Name Them Now, But That's How I Got Noticed.

Some People Say Funny Things - But I Say Things Funny.

Well, I Call Myself An Actor. I Always Wanted To Be One.