It Was A Great Olympics - Team

I Got Every Dan Shaughnessy Book Known To Man.

Facebook Founder Mark Zuckerberg Apparently Called President Obama Directly To Complain About Nsa And How It Spies On Ordinary Americans. That's Right, The Guy Who Runs Facebook Got Mad At The Nsa For Spying On People. Talk About The Pot Unfriending The Kettle!

During A Speech On Sunday, President Obama Said To The Crowd, 'we've Got To Vote. Vote. Vote. Vote. Vote. Vote.' This Went On For An Hour Until Someone Finally Fixed His Teleprompter.

A New Study Found That Americans Are Exercising More Than Ever But Still Not Losing Much Weight. Not Good In Fact, It's All I Could Think About On My Jog To Dunkin' Donuts.

Honestly, I Just Want To Keep People Awake. Or At Least Give You One Joke To Go To Bed With.