In Real Life, I Tend To Yell

You Know What It Was Like? It Was Like Thinking I Was Heading To A Surprise Party And Instead It Was A Surprise Pap Smear.

I Can't Believe Anyone Would Voluntarily Run 26 Miles. Sometimes I Sit On The Couch Cross-legged Because I Don't Feel Like Walking To The Bathroom.

Over The Summer We Chatted One Night While Angie Stripped A Bed, Changed Wet Sheets, Comforted And Repajamaed A Toddler, And Chased Down A Car Of Speeding Teenagers While Shaking A Brick At Them, Never Once Interrupting The Conversation Or Setting Down Her Margarita. The Only Reason This Woman Isn't President Of General Motors Is Because She's Chosen Not To Be.

Everyone Who Reads Me Is Someone I'd Like To Hang Out With.

In Real Life, I Tend To Yell At People A Lot. Not Because I'm Bossy Or Mean, But Because I'm Frustrated.