You Think You're So Cool Just Because

As A Reader, I Notice Political Views Regardless Of Whether Or Not The Book Is Fiction. What Annoys Me Is When Said Views Do Nothing To Advance The Narrative.

For The Record? I Have Never Been Her Baby. In Fact, I Reject The Notion Of Coming Out Of Her Body. I Prefer To Believe I Was Hatched, Or Perhaps Purchased.

I Tried, It Was Hard, I Quit, The End. Story Of My Life.

Everyone Who Reads Me Is Someone I'd Like To Hang Out With.

When I Hug Her, I Notice She's Still Wearing Yesterday's False Eyelashes. Mom? You Know Those Come Off With A Little Makeup Remover And A Cotton Pad?" I'm Not Taking Them Off." Why Not?" I Spent $180 On That Makeup Job And I Refuse To Wash My Face Until I Get My Money's Worth.