I'm Thirty Years Old, But I Read

After Years Of Begging, I Got My Parents To Get Me A Little Craig Tape Recorder, A Reel To Reel. Then I Started Recording Voices, Or Recording Jonathan Winters Off Television And Stuff Like That.

The Two Things That Can Hurt You Are If You Need Money Or If You Need Fame. Those Are The Things That Can Be Your Achilles' Heel. But If You Don't Need Money And You Don't Need Fame, Then You're Free.

My Obama Is Getting Pretty Good ... I Think I'll Vote For Whoever Makes My Portrayal Easier. It Takes Time To Put Together A Comic Impression. It Takes Time To Recognize The Tics. Right Now, For Instance, I Could Do A Dead- On Paul Ryan And People Wouldn't Recognize It. Personalities Take A While To Sin.

I Know It's A Cliche, But The Whole Family Is Just Whacked. I Mean, We're All Out Of Our Minds. They're The Funniest, Most Eccentric Bizarre People I've Ever Met, My Siblings.

You Know Ladies And Gentlemen, A Long Time Ago , There Were Lots Of People, But That Was A Long Time Ago