I'm Sick Of Soup Of The Day,

I've Never Been To A Hotel With A Rotating Restaurant On Top, But One Time I Took My Girlfriend To A Merry-go-round, And I Gave Her A Burrito.

Here's A Thought For Sweat Shop Owners: Air Conditioning. Problem Solved.

When You're Doing A Show On Stage, And They Show You A Red Light, That Means You Have 5 Minutes Left. At Some Clubs, They Hold A Candle Up In The Back. That's The Worst Method. You're Up Here, And Then You See A Floating Candle. "oh, No! This Place Is Haunted!" I Can't Be Funny When I'm Frightened.

I Wish I Could Play Little League Now. I'd Be Way Better Than Before.

My Friend Asked Me If I Wanted A Frozen Banana. I Said 'no, But I Want A Regular Banana Later, So... Yeah.'