I'm One Of Those People That Picks

One Pleasant Surprise Was When I Interviewed Butch Patrick. I Was Expecting This Bitter Old Drunk, And Instead He Had A Total Sense Of Humor About His Career And His Drinking And Drug Problem.

I Would Show Up At A Party For Al Qaeda If You Said There's Going To Be A Dinner.

I Always Feel That Most Political Jokes, If You're Going To Do Them, You Have To Do Them Within The Next Five Minutes, Or Else They're Outdated. By The Time You've Got It To The Point That It's Strong, It Would Be 12 Years Old.

There Are Times When I've Had Ideas Walking Down The Street That I Thought Were Great, And The Minute I Got Onstage, I Would Think Of Them And Go, 'wow, That Would Never Work,' Even Before I Did It In Front Of The Audience.

I Was Talking To Jesus, And I Said, Jesus, I Feel Like No One Will Ever Accept Me. And Jesus Looked At Me And Said, You Know What My Theory Is? Accept Me Or Go To Hell.