I'm Not Catholic, But I Gave Up

Some Comedians Change Their Style, Often To Their Advantage; But I See No Reason Why I Can't Continue With The "urbane Sophisticate" 'til The Day I Die.

Charlie Chaplin Is The Greatest Artist Of The 20th Century. He Takes Me From Laughter To Tears In Seconds. And He Was One Of The Very First Funny Men. It's Like The Original Violins Were Made In Cremona And There's Never Been Any Better Since. Sometimes The Best Come Right Off The Bat.

Every Time I See Dan Quayle I Feel Like Buying A Vowel.

I'm Learning Cuban. It's Like Spanish, But With Fewer Words For Luxury Items.

Now There's A Seven-day Waiting Period To Buy A Gun. Who Can Stay Mad That Long?