I'm A Great Lover, I'll Bet.

I Think The Whole Concept Of Monotheism Is A Gift From The Gods.

Whatever Happened To The Good Ole Days, When Children Worked In Factories?

When I Was 10, I Beat Up The School Bully. His Arms Were In Casts. That's What Gave Me The Courage.

I Saw A Psychologist Once Because I Thought I Had Depression. It Cost Me $100. When I Left, I Realised That There's Nothing He Could Have Said That Would Cheer Me Up As Much As If I Found A $100 Bill On My Way Home.

Everyone, Everywhere, And All The Time, Used To Laugh At Me When I Was Growing Up. So, When I Was Around 18, I Thought, 'i'll Become A Comedian, And Then If Everyone Laughs At Me, I'll Be Famous.' So I Went On Stage One Night And, For The First Time In My Life, Everyone Stopped Laughing At Me.