I Was At A Bar Nursing A

Women: You Can't Live With Them, And You Can't Get Them To Dress Up In A Skimpy Little Nazi Costume And Beat You With A Warm Squash Or Something.

I Once Had A Large Gay Following, But I Ducked Into An Alleyway And Lost Him.

I'm Not Catholic, But I Gave Up Picking My Belly Button For Lint.

I've Always Had A Special Place In My Heart For Old Women Digging Through Garbage Bins. They Saved My Life So Many Times As A Baby.

So I'm At The Wailing Wall, Standing There Like A Moron, With My Harpoon.