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A Friend Of Mine Gave Me A Philip Glass Record. I Listened To It For Five Hours Before I Realized It Had A Scratch On It.

I Was At A Bar Nursing A Beer. My Nipple Was Getting Quite Soggy.

Countries Are Making Nuclear Weapons Like There Is No Tomorrow.

When Deciding Between Two Competing Theories, Always Go With The One That Doesn't Involve A Magic Spell.

My Ex-girlfriend Was Very Sexy. She Reminded Me Of The Sphinx Because She Was Very Mysterious And Eternal And Solid...and Her Nose Was Shot Off By French Soldiers.