If You Drink Don't Drive. Don't Even

The Thing I Notice First About A Woman Is Her Walk. A Beautiful Woman Is Like A Race Horse-slim, Sleek And With A Beautiful Carriage.

I Was So Drunk Last Night I Fell Down And Missed The Floor.

Haven't Got A Girl, But I Can Wish. So I'll Take Me Down To Main Street And That's Where I'll Select My Imaginary Dish.

There's A Statue Of Jimmy Stewart In The Hollywood Wax Museum, And The Statue Talks Better Than He Does.

The Reason I Drink Is Because When I'm Sober I Think I'm Eddie Fisher.