If I Wasn't A Golfer, I Would

I Think We're All Good And Bad, But Good's Not Funny. Bad Is Funny. Suppress The Good And Let The Bad Out, And Then You Can Be Funny.

Hey, I May Loathe Myself, But It Has Nothing To Do With The Fact That I'm Jewish.

Anyone Can Be Confident With A Full Head Of Hair. But A Confident Bald Man - There's Your Diamond In The Rough.

Sometimes You Have To Rely On Sex And Bodily Functions.

Woody Allen Likes To Do A Lot Of Master Shots. He Likes To Get The Whole Thing In One Take, And So You Could Be Going Along Doing A Scene, And Then The Next To Last Line, All Of A Sudden, You Stumble, And You Have To Go Back To First Base.