If I Wasn't A Golfer, I Would

If You Tell The Truth About How You're Feeling, It Becomes Funny.

I Don't Like Talking To People I Know, But Strangers, I Have No Problem With.

I'd Much Rather Be On Stage Talking To A Couple Of Retards For Twenty Bucks Than Sitting At My Desk Thinking Up Jokes For...well Let's Say A Few Dollars More.

I Just Feed Off The Energy Of The Audience.

Did Bill Clinton Actually Think That He Could Get Blow Jobs From A Jewish Woman And There Would Be No Consequences?