I Wish I Had Played Team Sports.

If There's One Thing That Everyone Can Agree On, It's That, Right Or Wrong, They Hate The Press.

I Love The Excess Of Christmas. The Shopping Season That Begins In September, The Bad Pop Star Recordings Of Christmas Carols, The Decorations That Don't Know When To Come Down.

While Some Of My Closest Friends Were Jocks, It Seemed That They Spoke A Different Language With Each Other. Joining In Their Conversation Was Fraught With Risk.

One Christmas My Father Kept Our Tree Up Till March. He Hated To See It Go. I Loved That.

When It Comes To War, We Focus More On The Mainstream Coverage Of The Event, Rather Than The Event Itself. People Dying Is Never Funny. Protest Puppets Are Always Funny.