I Was So Ugly My Mother Used

One Day As I Came Home Early, I Saw A Man Jogging Naked. I Said To The Guy, 'hey, Buddy, Why Are You Doing That?' He Said, 'because You Came Home Early.'

They Took A Survey: Why Do Men Get Up In The Middle Of The Night? Ten Percent Get Up To Go To The Bathroom And 90 Percent Get Up To Go Home.

My Kids Scotch Tape Worms To The Sidewalk And Watch The Birds Get Hernias.

When I Told My Wife She Was Lousy In Bed - She Went Out - She Got A Second Opinion.

When I Played In The Sandbox, The Cat Kept Covering Me Up.