I Went To A Massage Parlor, It

I'm At An Age Where I Think More About Food Than I Do About Sex. Last Week I Put A Mirror Over My Dining Room Table.

Last Time I Saw A Mouth Like That, It Had A Hook In It.

She Was So Fat That Her Bikini Is Made Out Of Two Bed Sheets (king-size).

My Life Is Nothing But Pressure. All Pressure. This Pressure Is Like A Heaviness. It's Always On Top Of Me, This Heaviness. It's Always There Since I'm A Kid. Other People Wake Up In The Morning, 'a New Day! Ah, Up And At 'em!' I Wake Up, The Heaviness Is Waiting For Me Nice. Sometimes I Even Talk To It. I Say [adopts Cheerful Voice] 'hi, Heaviness!' And The Heaviness Looks Back At Me, [in An Ominous Growl] 'today You're Gonna Get It Good. You'll Be Drinking Early Today.'

Look Out For Number One And Try Not To Step In Number Two.