He Taught Me Never To Smile, Which

Even The Worst Comic Is At Least Somewhat Entertaining, If Only In A Pathological Way, For Five Minutes.

I've Been Wrestling With Reality For Most Of My Life. I'm Pleased To Say I've Won.

I Once Had A Large Gay Following, But I Ducked Into An Alleyway And Lost Him.

I Go To Pick Up A Girl In A Bar. I Say Will You Go Home With Me? She Says I Don't Know, Do You Have Cable? I Say No, But The Rope Should Work Just Fine.

Computers Aren't Intelligent, They Only Think They Are.