I Was A Sober As The Next

I Personally Believe That Each Of Us Was Put Here For A Purpose -- To Build Not To Destroy. If I Can Make People Smile, Then I Have Served My Purpose For God.

I Get Plenty Of Exercise Carrying The Coffins Of My Friends Who Exercise.

I'm Nuts And I Know It. But So Long As I Make 'em Laugh, They Ain't Going To Lock Me Up.

People Think I Am Dead Because They Haven’t Seen Me Around For Awhile. I’m Not Dead, I’m Very Much Alive, As You Can See. Although, There Are Two Things I Do Before I Get Up Every Morning. I Look Around And If I Don’t Smell Flowers Or See Candles Flickering I Go Ahead And Get Up.

I Know My Limit. I Just Keep Passing Out Before I Reach It.