I Tried Body Surfing Once, But How

Always Remember The Last Words Of My Grandfather, Who Said: 'a Truck!'

I've Learned That You Can't Make Someone Love You. All You Can Do Is Stalk Them And Hope They'll Panic And Give In.

I Got A Letter From The Irs. Apparently I Owe Them $800. So I Sent Them A Letter Back. I Said, If You'll Remember, I Fastened My Return With A Paper Clip, Which According To Your Very Own Latest Government Pentagon Spending Figures Will More Than Make Up For The Difference.

Libertarians Believe Consenting Adults Have The Right To Do Whatever They Choose, Except Band Together.

A Computer Once Beat Me At Chess, But It Was No Match For Me At Kick Boxing.