I Play A Musical Instrument A Little,

We Are Living In The Machine Age. For The First Time In History The Comedian Has Been Compelled To Supply Himself With Jokes And Comedy Material To Compete With The Machine. Whether He Knows It Or Not, The Comedian Is On A Treadmill To Oblivion.

Cocktail Party: A Gathering Held To Enable Forty People To Talk About Themselves At The Same Time. The Man Who Remains After The Liquor Is Gone Is The Host.

Hollywood Is A Great Place If You're An Orange.

I Play A Musical Instrument A Little, But Only For My Own Amazement.

Television Is A Triumph Of Equipment Over People, And The Minds That Control It Are So Small That You Could Put Them In A Gnat's Navel With Room Left Over For Two Caraway Seeds And An Agent's Heart.