I May Be Middle Class, But I'm

I'm Not Worried About The Third World War. That's The Third World's Problem.

In Pizza Express You Can Get Garlic Bread With Cheese And Tomato. Now Correct Me If I'm Wrong, But That's A Pizza.

I Do Realise That When I Laugh, It Sounds Like A Seal Is Being Molested.

More People Are Going Out To Comedy Shows Than They Were Before.

There Was One Time Where I Failed To Perform Sexually. My Girlfriend Said To Me "oh Don't Worry, It Happens To A Lot Of Guys". Ok, There Are Two Things Wrong With That. First Of All Who Are These Other Guys?, And Second Of All If It's Happening To More Than One Of Us, Don't You Think It Could Be Your Fault?