I Make Enemies Deliberately. They Are The

Only Those Who Have Earned Leisure Know How To Use It Profitably.

The Cocktail Party Is Easily The Worst Invention Since Castor Oil

[on The British Museum:] It Was Manifestly Impossible To Read All The Books In That Huge, Gloomy Structure, But I Made A Good Try And Accumulated A Fund Of Useless Information Guaranteed To Cast A Pall Over Any Dinner Table.

The Loudest Psalm Singer In The Congregation Always Is A Reformed Sinner.

Don't Try For Wit. Settle For Humor. You'll Last Longer.