I Love Talking To The Audience, And

My Mom Said She Learned How To Swim When Someone Took Her Out In The Lake And Threw Her Off The Boat. I Said, 'mom, They Weren't Trying To Teach You How To Swim.'

The Wages Of Sin Are Death, But By The Time Taxes Are Taken Out, It's Just Sort Of A Tired Feeling.

I Think We Need A 12-step Group For Non-stop Talkers. We're Going To Call It On And On Anon.

I Don't Need A Holiday Or A Feast To Feel Grateful For My Children, The Sun, The Moon, The Roof Over My Head, Music, And Laughter, But I Like To Take This Time To Take The Path Of Thanks Less Traveled.

I Have Terrible Short-term Memory Loss, Which I Like To Think Of As Presidential Eligibility.