I Love Anyone Who Surprises Me And

My Sister Is Going To Have A Simple Wedding. Just Immediate Family. And Whoever The Hell Would Want To Marry Her.

I'm Actually A Really Nice Guy, Once You Get To Blow Me.

My Favorite Sport Is Football. I'm A Die Hard Steelers Fan. Favorite Players Were Hines Ward And Greg Lloyd.

Everyone Gets Laid Off And Everyone In Hollywood Gets Unemployment For Six Months While They're Looking For A New Job. So I Would Just Do Stand-up For Six Months And Think I Was Really Making It, And When My Unemployment Ran Out, I Had To Get Another Job Immediately.

My Dad Was A Complicated Man. He Was A Huge Racist, My Dad, But He Still Tried To Be A Good Father, You Know? Like, He Would Tell Me That Santa Claus Was Black - That Way, When I Found Out He Didn't Exist, It Wouldn't Be That Big A Let Down.