I Live To Laugh, And I Laugh

You Can Lead A Man To Congress, But You Can't Make Him Think.

I Bought A Christmas Tree For Twenty Dollars. When I Came Home The Next Day, My Wife Was Wearing It In Her Hair.

The Last Time I Saw Marilyn Was In Late 1959, When I Appeared In Let's Make Love At Fox. The Wide-eyed Marilyn I Had First Known Was Gone. This Marilyn Was More Beautiful Than Ever.

This Man's Wife Told Him, "for Christmas, Surprise Me." On Christmas Eve He Leaned Over Where She Was Sleeping And Said, "boo!"

My Doctor Told Me That Jogging Could Add Years To My Life. I Think He Was Right. I Feel Ten Years Older Already.