I Like To Think Of Myself As

War Toys Are Scary. They Have A Rocket Launcher With A Bayonet Attached, In Case You Miss.

I Just Filled Out My Income Tax Forms. Who Says You Can't Get Killed By A Blank?

One Of Those Christmas Songs Says, "you Better Not Shout, You Better Not Cry, You Better Not Pout." How's My Wife Going To Get Along?

Your Marriage Is In Trouble If Your Wife Says, 'you're Only Interested In One Thing,' And You Can't Remember What It Is.

The Post Office Is Very Careful Nowadays. When They Get A Package Marked "fragile," They Throw It Underhand.