I Like To Think Of Myself As

He Was Such A Bad Writer, They Revoked His Poetic License.

If Opportunity Doesn't Knock, Build A Door, But Only As Long As It's Not Visible From The Street.

My Son Gave Me A Nice Bottle Of Cologne - Eau De Owe.

Valentine's Day Is Like Armistice Day - You Declare A Truce.

Santa Is Having A Tough Time This Year. Last Year He Deducted Eight Billion For Gifts, And The Irs Wants An Itemized List