I Like Children - Fried.

Now Don't Say You Can't Swear Off Drinking; It's Easy. I've Done It A Thousand Times.

The Income Tax Was Devised To Give Lawyers And Certified Public Accountants Business. Few Persons Can Make Head, Tail, Or Middle Out Of It. Einstein Admitted He Couldn't.

I've Been Barbecued, Stewed, Screwed, Tattooed, And Fried By People Claiming To Be My Friends. The Human Race Has Gone Backward, Not Forward, Since The Days We Were Apes Swinging Through The Trees.

Take Me Down To The Bar! We'll Drink Breakfast Together!

After Two Days In The Hospital, I Turn To The Nurse.