I Hope They Bury Me Near A

Why Don't You Bore A Hole In Yourself And Let The Sap Run Out?

Money Frees You From Doing Things You Dislike. Since I Dislike Doing Nearly Everything, Money Is Handy.

This Book Was Written In Those Long Hours I Spent Waiting For My Wife To Get Dressed To Go Out. And If She Had Never Gotten Dressed At All This Book Would Never Have Been Written.

Hey You! I Told You To Slow That Nag Down! Because Of You, I Almost Heard The Opera!

Growing Old Is Something You Do If You're Lucky.