I Hate A Hook. It Nauseates Me.

A Shot That Goes In The Cup Is Pure Luck, But A Shot To Within Two Feet Of The Flag Is Skill.

As You Walk Down The Fairway Of Life You Must Smell The Roses, For You Only Get To Play One Round.

Jesus Christ Can't Hit A Golf Ball Straight. It's Virtually Impossible - At Best It's An Accident.

I Play Golf With Friends Sometimes, But There Are Never Friendly Games.

I See No Reason That A Golf Course Cannot Be Played In 18 Birdies. Just Because No One Has Ever Done That Doesn't Mean It Can't Be Done.