I Finally Had A Ship Tattooed To

My Cooking Is So Bad My Kids Thought Thanksgiving Was To Commemorate Pearl Harbor.

Fang And I Are Always Fighting. When We Get Up In The Morning, We Don't Kiss; We Touch Gloves.

When I Was A Kid And We Used To Play Post Office, I Was The Dead Letter Office.

There's So Little Money In My Bank Account, My Scenic Checks Show A Ghetto.

Everybody Knows How Much Time Fang Spends In Bed. A Local Store That Gives A 30 Days' Trial On Mattresses Gives Fang Only 15 Days.