I Was The World's Ugliest Baby. When

My Cooking Is So Bad My Kids Thought Thanksgiving Was To Commemorate Pearl Harbor.

If You Don't Have Wrinkles, You Haven't Laughed Enough.

Just Because I Have Rice On My Clothes Doesn't Mean I've Been To A Wedding. A Chinese Man Threw Up On Me.

Life Began On This Planet When The First Amoeba Split. Mankind Will Still Be Seeking God, Not Accepting That God Is A Spirit; Can't See It, Touch It, Only Feel It. It's Called Love.

Right From The Start My Parents Had Left Me To Fend For Myself. Apparently Unaware That I Was A Kid, They Invariably Treated Me Like An Adult, Perhaps Because They Themselves Were No Spring Chickens.