I Became A Stand-up Comedienne Because I

You Know You're Old When Your Walker Has An Airbag.

Everybody Knows How Lazy He Is. One Day The Neighbors Saw Fang Mow The Lawn And I Got Three Get Well Cards.

Most Children Threaten At Times To Run Away From Home. This Is The Only Thing That Keeps Some Parents Going.

Housework Can't Kill You, But Why Take A Chance?

I Finally Had A Ship Tattooed To My Chest. I Wanted Something On It.