Girls Throw Their Panties On The Stage,

Everyone, Everywhere, And All The Time, Used To Laugh At Me When I Was Growing Up. So, When I Was Around 18, I Thought, 'i'll Become A Comedian, And Then If Everyone Laughs At Me, I'll Be Famous.' So I Went On Stage One Night And, For The First Time In My Life, Everyone Stopped Laughing At Me.

The Other Night, The President Gave A Speech. He Said, "children Are Our Most Prescious Natural Resource". I Thought, "let's Hope It Never Comes To That".

Computers Aren't Intelligent, They Only Think They Are.

You Know What I Hate? Indian Givers... No, I Take That Back.

I Love Florida. I Love The Beach. I Love The Sound Of The Crashing Surfers Against The Rocks.